adBlockCheck
August 12, 2016
77°
77°

Participation: 35%

Stocks
F -4.18%

Ford (F): $15.13 (-$0.66) (-4.18%) A company announcement this afternoon that the 2014 Ford Explorer would feature only one cubic foot of trunk space triggered panic among investors.

America's Finest News Source
“Tu Stultus Es”

Olympics 2016

More Coverage

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.

In The News

Report: Some People Actually Very Happy

ITHACA, NY—Indicating that such individuals regularly experience feelings of satisfaction and derive genuine enjoyment from their daily existence, a report released Thursday by Cornell University’s psychology department has determined that some people are actually very happy.

‘Rugrats’ Turns 25

This August marks the 25th anniversary of the premiere of Rugrats, the beloved Nickelodeon cartoon about intrepid baby Tommy Pickles and his group of toddler friends. Here are some milestones from the show’s nine-season run

Special Coverage

Graphical Features

Recommended

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close