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$1.6 Billion On White House PR

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360 Tour: Inside The RNC

The Onion invites you to explore our view from the floor of the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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$1.6 Billion On White House PR

According to the Government Accountability Office, the Bush Administration spent $1.6 billion in public relations and advertising in the past 30 months. What do you think?
  • "Did they run anything during the Super Bowl? If not, that seems out of line."

    Adam Kleinschmidt Barista
  • "I'd say the ads were successful. George Bush has become a household name."

    Kate Lyon Event Manager
  • "I didn't realize it cost so much to make oneself look like an apocalyptic nightmare."

    Terry Rowe Pastry Chef

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