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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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4 In 10 U.S. Households Headed By Female Breadwinners

According to U.S. Census data, women are now the sole or primary income-earners in 40 percent of American households with children below the age of 18, which is up from 11 percent in 1960. What do you think?

  • “Sure. But I still decide what movie we go see on Friday night.”

    Tripp Sandin Police Commissioner
  • “I just wish my old lady would stop mentioning her salary during lovemaking.”

    Larry Horneff Extruder Operator
  • “All my lazy wife does is sit around the house being eight-and-a-half months pregnant.”

    Bob Guiry Dried Fruit Washer
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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

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