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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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5,000 Killed In Syria In August

Activist groups claimed that 5,000 Syrians were killed last month as the Assad regime stepped up its bloody crackdown on the nation’s civilian uprising, marking the highest monthly death toll since the conflict began in March 2011. What do you think?

  • “Man, Assad’s getting really good at killing people.”

    Matthew Mast Truss Assembler
  • “This seems like an awful lot of work just to keep being the president of Syria.”

    Shaun Lipschultz Gem Cutter
  • “I know, right? This hot summer weather has really made people short-tempered.”

    Mariah Nakatsuka Soil Fertility Expert
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