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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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64-Year-Old Woman Swims From Cuba To Florida

After four unsuccessful attempts, 64-year-old Diana Nyad this weekend became only the second person to swim from Cuba to Florida and the first to do so without the aid of a shark cage, traversing the 110-mile distance in 53 hours. What do you think?

  • “It just goes to show that if you don’t give up, you can swim really far for no discernible reason.”

    Murphy Lang Unemployed
  • “I’m not that impressed because I do a lot without the aid of a shark cage.”

    Dylan Kepler Novelty Shirt Vendor
  • “I’d rather just grow out my fingernails indefinitely, thanks.”

    Laetitia Ramon Museum Curator
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