adBlockCheck

Recent News

Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
End Of Section
  • More News

9/11 Families Upset Over New Remains

Families of the victims of 9/11 are angry as new remains—including wallets, clothing, and bones—were discovered at Ground Zero. What do you think?
  • "C'mon Ann Coulter, lash out against those bone-seeking, personal-effects junkies who dare to call themselves relatives."

    Lucielle Maslin Nurse
  • "So that's where my arm bone is. Man, I have been looking for that for, like, five years."

    Harold Kurner Golf Trainer
  • "People complain that the site was never treated like a proper crime scene— but as a souvenir and memorabilia salesman, let me tell you, it was days before they let us in there."

    Joseph Rabnett Salesman

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close