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A Polarized Nation

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Voyager Probe Badly Damaged After Smashing Into End Of Universe

PASADENA, CA—Confirming that several components had broken off the craft and that most of its scientific instruments were no longer operational, officials from NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory announced that Voyager 1, the pioneering space probe launched in 1977, had been severely damaged Thursday after crashing into the end of the universe.

Leaked Documents Reveal Studio Executives Knew About ‘Gods Of Egypt’ Before It Released Onto Public

SANTA MONICA, CA—Suggesting that the disastrous events of three months ago could have been averted, federal investigators stated Wednesday that a trove of leaked documents confirmed high-ranking studio executives had full knowledge of Gods Of Egypt long before the film was released onto unsuspecting Americans.Investigators described those who allowed such a screenplay to be carried out as “extremely sick and heartless individuals.”

Books Vs. E-Readers

Though e-readers have increasingly supplanted books in the digital age, many bibliophiles defend the importance of physical texts. Here is a side-by-side comparison of physical books and e-books
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A Polarized Nation

Many people say the nation became even more politically polarized in 2004. What do you think?
  • "Come on. The nation hasn't experienced a moment of unity in decades, except for the 'who shot J.R.?' craze and those two weeks in September 2001."

    Cory Shade Parking Attendant
  • "Yeah. Sheesh—women!"

    Frankin Stedder Director
  • "Our nation will never be healed so long as those redneck rubes in flyover land refuse to listen to reason, and continue to vote for who they want."

    Duane Segar Systems Analyst
  • "Yes, the rift between the left-leaning centrist moderate Republicans and the right-leaning ultra conservative Republicans grows ever wider."

    Karen Anderson Cellist
  • "I got this funny e-mail about the red and blue states. I can't remember exactly what it said, but it was funny in that poignant sort of way."

    Tom Knight Plumbers Assistant
  • "Polarized sounds like one of those fancy liberal words. Why don't you just say 'right' and 'wrong'?"

    Jill Karls Nurse

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