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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Abercrombie & Fitch Dropping Logos From Clothes

After years of plummeting sales, Abercrombie & Fitch has announced that it will drop its once-prized logos from all of its upcoming clothing lines to compete with competitors like Forever 21 and H&M. What do you think?

  • “Ah, they finally realized how much cooler it is to belatedly copy your rivals.”

    Danny Metzler Assistant Doorman
  • “Godspeed to the CEO who had to face down such a difficult decision.”

    David Graf Skylight Cleaner
  • “This is a good start, but I’m still way too intimidated by teenagers to shop there.”

    Susan Marshall Napkin Folder
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