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The Life Of Diana, Princess Of Wales

Today marks 20 years since the funeral of Princess Diana, known to many as the “people’s princess.” The Onion looks back at the life of Princess Diana before it was cut tragically short.

Study: Other Countries Weird

BOSTON—Examining a wide variety of cross-cultural data, a Boston University study released Monday determined that other countries are weird.

Japanese Family Puts Aging Robot In Retirement Home

KYOTO, JAPAN—Saying the move to the assisted care facility was the right decision after so many years of operation, members of the Akiyama family finally put their aging robot in a retirement home, sources reported Friday.

North Korea Successfully Detonates Nuclear Scientist

PYONGYANG—Hailing it as a significant step forward for their ballistic weapons program just hours after suffering a failed missile launch, North Korean leaders announced Monday they had successfully detonated a nuclear scientist.
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Afghan Opium Yields Highest Ever

Cultivation of opium poppies in Afghanistan reached a record level for the second year in a row, rising by 60 percent. What do you think?
  • "I think I'll wait another year to join NA, just to see how this thing pans out."

    Kevin Elliott Corporate Librarian
  • "I just don't understand how Afghanistan can be such a depressing place with all that opium around."

    Regina Davis Photographer's Assistant
  • "Finally, the Darwinian population control variable we've been waiting for."

    Raphael Jurwicz Systems Analyst

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