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A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

What You Need To Know About The Trump Administration’s Ties To Russia

New revelations from the U.S. intelligence community about potentially illegal communications between members of the Trump administration and Russian officials, which led to Michael Flynn resigning as national security advisor Monday, have increased calls for a wider investigation of Trump’s murky ties to Russia. Here’s what you need to know.
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Airline Passenger Complaints Up Sharply

According to data from the Department of Transportation, the number of passenger complaints about airline travel soared 20 percent in 2012, with United earning the title of the most complained-about airline. What do you think?

  • “As the talkative guy eating a tuna salad sandwich next to you, I’m largely to blame for this report.”

    Wayne Lemmon Buckle Gluer
  • “Why are these people complaining to the Department of Transportation when there’s a perfectly good flight attendant on the plane they could scream at right there?”

    Brooke Cochran Electrode Cleaner
  • “These people need to relax, open up the latest issue of Hemispheres, and lose themselves in a story about Jacksonville’s nightlife hot spots.”

    Dirk Osterberg Systems Analyst
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