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Woman Conducting Ongoing Scientific Experiment On Own Skin

DULUTH, MN—Noting her methodic applications of various chemical agents in carefully controlled combinations, sources confirmed Wednesday that local woman Sara Holloway has been carrying out an open-ended scientific experiment on her own skin.

Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Al-Jazeera In English?

Al-Jazeera, the Arab news station, is preparing to launch an international English-language version of their channel. What do you think?
  • "Arabic media are just a mouthpiece for Big Falafel."

    Kevin Thompson Copywriter
  • "And just the other day I was wondering where I was going to go for some fluff pieces about goat care!"

    Katherine Yablon Medical Intern
  • "Thinly veiled government propaganda disguised as news would never fly in America."

    Bill Higgins Projectionist
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