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Man Knows Exactly Which Asshole Got Him Sick

SARATOGA SPRINGS, NY—Immediately realizing the genesis of the fever and sore throat that left him feeling like shit, 30-year-old local man Edward Mosley told reporters Tuesday that he knows exactly which asshole got him sick.

How Gerrymandering Works

The Supreme Court is considering a case regarding the partisan gerrymandering of districts in Wisconsin, which could change the way maps are drawn across the country. Here is a step-by-step guide to how Gerrymandering works.
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Alito Confirmation Likely

Despite a contentious hearing, Samuel Alito appears to be on track to be nominated to replace Sandra Day O'Connor. What do you think?
  • "I don't care who gets confirmed at this point. Just get Ted Kennedy off my fucking television."

    Chris Grace Office Manager
  • "How can the Senate spend so much time on this nonsense? Don't they have awful laws to rubber-stamp?"

    Elna Baker Hostess
  • "I'm not sure he'll be confirmed. The Senate asked him where he sees himself in five years, and his response showed very little initiative."

    Mauricio Bermidez Statistician

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