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Nation’s Sanitation Workers Announce Everything Finally Clean

‘Please Try To Keep It This Way,’ Say Workers

WASHINGTON—After spending years sweeping and scrubbing across all 50 states, the nation’s sanitation workers announced Thursday that everything was finally clean and asked Americans if they could please keep it that way.
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Amazon Testing Drone Delivery Service

Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos recently revealed that the online retailer has been experimenting with a new drone-based delivery method called Amazon Prime Air, in which unmanned vehicles would fly packages to a customer’s doorstep within 30 minutes of their order. What do you think?

  • “So they do read the suggestions we send.”

    Craig Hirsch Systems Analyst
  • “Cowards!”

    Charlotte Peck Mathematician
  • “Thirty minutes is too long. I need my Duckman DVD now.”

    Jarrod Holloway Massage Therapy Instructor

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