Amazon Testing Drone Delivery Service

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Horrifying Police Body Camera Footage Clearly Shows Current State Of America

CINCINNATI—Following a traffic stop earlier this month by a University of Cincinnati police officer that ended in the shooting death of an unarmed black motorist, authorities confirmed Thursday that the disturbing video recorded by the officer’s body camera clearly and graphically shows the current state of America.

Deadline For Prior User To Remove Clothes From Dryer Extended 5 Minutes

JOHNSON CITY, TN—Upon finding the machine in her apartment building’s laundry room completely untouched since she last stopped by, exasperated local woman Sandra Hermus reportedly mounted all her magnanimity Monday and extended the deadline for the previous user to remove their clothing from the dryer by five minutes.
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Deadline For Prior User To Remove Clothes From Dryer Extended 5 Minutes

JOHNSON CITY, TN—Upon finding the machine in her apartment building’s laundry room completely untouched since she last stopped by, exasperated local woman Sandra Hermus reportedly mounted all her magnanimity Monday and extended the deadline for the previous user to remove their clothing from the dryer by five minutes.

Area Man

This Great Song, Bar Sources Report

TOMAH, WI—Pausing their conversations momentarily to call attention to the music playing on the establishment’s jukebox, sources at local bar Shepherd’s confirmed to reporters Friday that this is a great song.

Amazon Testing Drone Delivery Service

Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos recently revealed that the online retailer has been experimenting with a new drone-based delivery method called Amazon Prime Air, in which unmanned vehicles would fly packages to a customer’s doorstep within 30 minutes of their order. What do you think?

  • “So they do read the suggestions we send.”

    Craig Hirsch
    Systems Analyst
  • “Cowards!”

    Charlotte Peck
    Mathematician
  • “Thirty minutes is too long. I need my Duckman DVD now.”

    Jarrod Holloway
    Massage Therapy Instructor