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American Cigarettes More Carcinogenic

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Charles Koch Orders Sniper To Fire Warning Shot Next To Marco Rubio On Debate Stage

GREENVILLE, SC—In response to the presidential candidate’s unsatisfactory answer to a question about the economic effects of environmental regulations, Koch Industries CEO Charles Koch reportedly ordered a sniper positioned in the rafters of the Greenville Peace Center to fire a warning shot near Marco Rubio’s podium during Saturday’s Republican debate.
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American Cigarettes More Carcinogenic

A study by the Centers for Disease Control found that compared to foreign brands, cigarettes made in the United States have three times the amount of cancer-causing nitrosamines. What do you think?

  • "Nitrosamines? Yuck. That's why I only smoke Chinese cigarettes, which have only been verifiably shown to contain female fertility hormones and trace amounts of ether."

    Carl Port
    Systems Analyst
  • "If we can't make them without cancer here, then it's time to start making U.S. cigarettes overseas."

    Suzi Licher
    Veneer Grader
  • "Whatever. I have health insurance now."

    Keith Loveless
    Sanitation Worker

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