Americans Opting For Small Dogs Over Babies

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DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Americans Opting For Small Dogs Over Babies

According to an analysis of data from the Department of Health, the decreasing number of Americans having babies corresponds to an increase in the number of small dogs they own, with young women birthing 400,000 fewer children at the same time that small dog ownership has doubled. What do you think?

  • “I prefer having both so they can compete for my affection.”

    Frank Stamper
    Gift Card Designer
  • “Why would anyone trade parenthood for the inexpensive ease of raising an unconditionally loving dog?”

    Cory Parker
    Stadium Operations Manager
  • “Well, dogs just have so many advantages over kids, like the fact that they don’t talk and I’m not capable of having children.”

    Kristen Brosnahan
    Account Specialist