adBlockCheck

Politics

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.

What Is Trump’s Relationship With White Nationalism?

Since the weekend’s violent protests in Charlottesville, VA, many have criticized President Trump for his failure to outright condemn the white supremacists involved. The Onion breaks down Trump’s relationship to this powerful hate group.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg Returns To Off-Season Lifeguarding Job

ALEXANDRIA, VA—Saying she hadn’t missed a summer since she was on the U.S. Court of Appeals, Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said Tuesday that she had once again returned to her off-season lifeguarding job at Splash Central waterpark.

President’s American Manufacturing Council Down To CEO Of Shoe Carnival

WASHINGTON—Following a series of resignations from prominent CEOs amid the fallout from President Trump’s handling of white-nationalist violence in Charlottesville, VA, White House sources confirmed Tuesday that Trump’s American Manufacturing Council is now down to a single member, Clifton Sifford, CEO and president of Shoe Carnival.
End Of Section
  • More News

'America’s Toughest Sheriff' Sued

The Justice Department sued Arizona's Joe Arpaio, the self-proclaimed "toughest sheriff" in America, for failure to cooperate with a discrimination probe. What do you think?

  • "Was he discriminating against injustice? Because that wouldn't be so bad."

    Simon Patches Unemployed
  • "I'd be scared that if I sued a sheriff he wouldn't let me date his daughter, who’s probably the prettiest girl in town."

    Keith Cano Bus Driver
  • "What does discriminating against people in Arizona who have limited English and low-paying jobs have to do with targeting immigrants?”

    Sylvia Mattox Merchandise Safety Consultant

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close