adBlockCheck

Recent News

Google Unveils New Larry Page–Driven Car

MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—Touting the project as its most advanced foray yet into the realm of personal transportation, Google unveiled its new Larry Page–driven car at a press event Wednesday.

Trump Outlines Bold Vision For Nation’s Next Mass Protests

WASHINGTON—Stirring the emotions of citizens across the nation with his strong and affecting rhetoric, President Donald Trump outlined a bold vision for the country’s next mass protests during his address to a joint session of Congress Tuesday night.

What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.
End Of Section
  • More News

Amnesty International Report Blasts United States, China

A new Amnesty International Report condemns China and the U.S. for turning a blind eye to global poverty and genocide. What do you think?
  • "Think globally, act locally. That's how I ended hunger in my gated community."

    Chuck Bolton Ice-Cream Scooper
  • "Global poverty and genocide are facts of life. We must focus on things we can actually accomplish—like discrediting Amnesty International."

    Randy Krauss Toy Sculptor
  • "Sorry, but I'm afraid I can't devote my attention to this cause until an attention-hungry celebrity poses naked for it."

    Neneh Williams Nanny
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Trump Outlines Bold Vision For Nation’s Next Mass Protests

WASHINGTON—Stirring the emotions of citizens across the nation with his strong and affecting rhetoric, President Donald Trump outlined a bold vision for the country’s next mass protests during his address to a joint session of Congress Tuesday night.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close