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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Trump’s Budget Proposal: What You Need To Know

President Trump has revealed his first budget blueprint, which contains $54 billion in cuts while accommodating increased spending on defense and security. The Onion details the major elements of Trump’s proposed budget:
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An Apology For Slavery?

As part of his recent campaign to address the problem of racism in America, President Clinton raised the possibility of apologizing for slavery. What do you think?
  • "I think the U.S. should have to write, 'I will not enslave an entire race of my fellow human beings ever again,' 1,000 times across the national blackboard."

    Theodore Cannell Plumber
  • "As far as reparations go, we shouldn't give them any money. It would be easier just to let them keep all the shit they ripped off."

    Max Eggert Systems Analyst
  • "Haven't we done enough for the black people, letting them share our water fountains?"

    Mary McCrory Telemarketer
  • "In 1993, after more than 3,900 years, the Egyptians finally apologized to the Jews. But they still didn't give them their long-promised 40 cubits and an ankh."

    Heather Greer Librarian
  • "Yo, apologies for slavery goin' out to all my homies out there: Tyrone, Darnell, G-Love, my boy Special K and all the fellas down on 113th, my moms, my shorties Shawanda and Laqueesha..."

    Phil Staunton Investment Banker
  • "The government can apologize all it wants and pay all the reparations it wants, but one thing's certain: Nobody's taking away my slaves."

    Ron Grabowski Math Teacher
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Trump’s Budget Proposal: What You Need To Know

President Trump has revealed his first budget blueprint, which contains $54 billion in cuts while accommodating increased spending on defense and security. The Onion details the major elements of Trump’s proposed budget:

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