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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
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Android Phones May Be Harvesting Data

A developer discovered a hard-to-detect bit of software on Android phones that tracks your location, phone calls, and text messages, and report them back to its maker. What do you think?

  • “What a relief! Now I can stop writing down detailed accounts of my day to send to my phone company.”

    Lawrence Kinney Systems Analyst
  • “Oh, great. When the network gains consciousness, it’s going to have atrocious grammar.”

    Sandy Nielsen Hide Puller
  • “I see nothing that could go wrong and lead to a dystopian society here! Doo doo doo. Off to work!”

    Arthur Johnson Sand Tester

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