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Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Can Trump Follow Through On His Campaign Promises?

President-elect Donald Trump made a variety of lofty promises during his campaign as part of a pledge to “make America great again.” The Onion looks at several of these promises and evaluates whether Trump will be willing or able to follow through on them.

Being A Mom Was The Best Four Years Of My Life!

As I get older, I find myself reflecting on my life more often and marveling at what an amazing journey it’s been. I’ve made tons of great friends, been to magnificent places all over the world, and learned so many important things about myself along the way. But if I’m being honest, there’s one period of my life that stands out from all the rest: those four incredible years when I was a mom.
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Angels Among Us?

A recent poll revealed that 63 percent of Americans believe in the existence of angels. What do you think?
  • "I was touched by an angel—last Saturday, on CBS."

    Otto Montville Podiatrist
  • "I believed in angels until I met Mother Teresa—what a bitch."

    Shannon Colavito Tax Attorney
  • "I believe my mother to be an angel. A perfect angel. I even stapled a little halo onto her head. I keep her in my basement."

    Cory Hooper Coal Miner
  • "My grandpa is an angel now, and he watches over my sister and brothers and me. Hi, my name is Jeffy, of Family Circus fame, and my creator, Bil Keane, is bat-shit insane."

    Alan Dwyer Meteorologist
  • "Innocent schoolgirl by day, high-priced hooker by night... How could you not believe in Angel?"

    Jim Tatum Tuba Player
  • "I thought I saw an angel once, but it was just my husband in a druid's cloak masturbating to organ music."

    Kathleen Foli Systems Analyst

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