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Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.

How To Combat Harassment Online

Online harassment is an increasingly contentious issue, with social media sites like Twitter and Reddit pressured to crack down on users’ abusive behavior. Here are The Onion’s tips for combating harassment online:

Strongside/Weakside: Deshaun Watson

After leading his team to victory in the College Football Playoff National Championship, Clemson University quarterback Deshaun Watson announced he would forgo his final year of eligibility and declare for the NFL Draft. Is he any good?

A Timeline Of Trump’s Relationship With The Press

President-elect Donald Trump routinely insists that he is treated unfairly by the press, while many in the news industry have openly expressed how difficult it can be to report on him in today’s chaotic media environment. Here is a timeline of the major events that have shaped this relationship.
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Anti-Paparazzi Legislation?

In the wake of Princess Diana's death while speeding from photographers, many are calling for anti-stalking laws that protect celebrities from paparazzi. What do you think?
  • "Boy, I thought the paparazzi were out of line back in '33, when their flashbulbs enraged Kong, causing him to escape and nearly destroy Manhattan. But this time they've gone too far."

    Ted Springs Civil Engineer
  • "I have a tip for the paparazzi—I will be dining tonight at the Shoney's on Highway 11. But please, no flashbulbs."

    Duane Eichhorn Landscaper
  • "To the paparazzi, I have only one question: How do you live with yourselves? Oh, and also, how do you avoid that red-eye effect?"

    Cheryl Pinsky Systems Analyst
  • "Movie stars should not be photographed."

    Suzanne Templeton Manicurist
  • "Remember when President Clinton held that nuclear test-ban summit in Iceland last year? Why couldn't the press just leave him alone?"

    Mitchell Cook Telemarketer
  • "As a longtime Princess Di photographer, I freely admit that we screwed up. We screwed ourselves out of another 40 years of making millions off photos of that stupid broad riding horses and shopping."

    Randy Quisling Photographer

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