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Voyager Probe Badly Damaged After Smashing Into End Of Universe

PASADENA, CA—Confirming that several components had broken off the craft and that most of its scientific instruments were no longer operational, officials from NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory announced that Voyager 1, the pioneering space probe launched in 1977, had been severely damaged Thursday after crashing into the end of the universe.

Leaked Documents Reveal Studio Executives Knew About ‘Gods Of Egypt’ Before It Released Onto Public

SANTA MONICA, CA—Suggesting that the disastrous events of three months ago could have been averted, federal investigators stated Wednesday that a trove of leaked documents confirmed high-ranking studio executives had full knowledge of Gods Of Egypt long before the film was released onto unsuspecting Americans.Investigators described those who allowed such a screenplay to be carried out as “extremely sick and heartless individuals.”

Books Vs. E-Readers

Though e-readers have increasingly supplanted books in the digital age, many bibliophiles defend the importance of physical texts. Here is a side-by-side comparison of physical books and e-books
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AOL To Charge For E-Mail

Yahoo and AOL want to begin charging companies one-fourth to one cent for preferential bulk e-mail delivery. What do you think?
  • "This is going to drive small companies like info@jckibffydmh right out of business."

    Jody Snyder Shoe Sales
  • "Finally, I'll be able to trust that my inbox will be filled only with legitimate, paid spam."

    Will Shepard Trivia Writer
  • "Would it be possible to make my family pay to send me inspirational-quote e-mails?"

    Carl Ferraiolo System Analyst

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