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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Apple Becomes Largest U.S. Company Ever

With $623.52 billion worth of shares outstanding at the close of trading yesterday, tech giant Apple became the largest American company of all-time as measured by the combined value of its stock, surpassing a mark set in late 1999 by Microsoft. What do you think?

  • “They deserve it. They make wonderful stocks.”

    Nick Platt Plant Breeder
  • “It’s a shame Steve Jobs died before he got to see his company achieve success.”

    Bill Mancini Bench-Molder Apprentice
  • “You know what it is? It’s all those products they sell.”

    Jacqueline Ellis Unemployed
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