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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
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Apple Dodged Billions In Taxes

Apple CEO Tim Cook was questioned by lawmakers today, following a congressional report that showed how the company used a complex web of offshore subsidiaries to keep the IRS from taxing at least $74 billion of its earnings over the past four years. What do you think?

  • “Well, at least they’re the only company doing it.”

    Dale Blum Unemployed
  • “That must be how they keep their prices so low.”

    Victor Totos Maple Syrup Maker
  • “You get ’em, Congress. Just because you created loopholes doesn’t mean companies should take advantage of them!”

    Amanda Turnbull Film Cutter

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