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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
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Apple Has More Cash Than U.S. Treasury

According to the most recent available financial statements, Apple Inc. has more cash on hand—over $76 billion—than the U.S. Treasury. What do you think?

  • "Well, the user experience in this country is just terrible."

    Lou Gajda Cable Splicer
  • "Great, so why don't we sell them a couple of aircraft carriers and we'll be back in black."

    Sonya Howland Film Flat Inspector
  • "This is why I took all my money out of U.S. currency and put it into safe, stable iTunes gift cards."

    Philip Keeton Yeast-Culture Developer

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