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Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Apple Pulls $1,000 iPhone App

An application called "I Am Rich," which displays a ruby on iPhone screens, was pulled from the phone's application store without notice. What do you think?
  • "Now what the hell am I gonna do with all this money?"

    Richard Billinglsy Stock Broker
  • "I guess Apple doesn't want to be associated with the rich."

    Frieda Trembeleau State Trooper
  • "I would blow $1,000 on a status symbol from Apple, but I wouldn't buy that application for it."

    Matthew Henderson Publicist

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