Apple Unveils iPad Mini

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Vol 48 Issue 43

Meat Loaf Endorses Romney

Performing after the band Big & Rich at a Romney rally last night, Meat Loaf offered the candidate an unusual, rambling endorsement in which the 65-year-old rocker mentioned that he had never been involved in politics before, that the Cold War is not ...

Man Throws Money At Problem

A birthday card is discreetly passed around the office like some sort of covert CIA operation, Apple's gag division unveils the sleekest fake dog shit to date, and cactus scientists recommend drinking 8 cups of water per year.

U.S. Signs Declaration Of Dependence On China

WASHINGTON—In what is certain to be regarded as a defining moment in the nation’s history, leading U.S. political figures gathered at the Capitol today to sign their names to the newly drafted Declaration of Dependence ...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Apple Unveils iPad Mini

At a press event today, Apple CEO Tim Cook unveiled the iPad Mini, a 7.9-inch version of its popular iPad tablet that features an ultrathin, light design and is intended to compete with smaller e-readers such as the Kindle Fire and Google Nexus 7. What do you think?

  • “Finally, a device more convenient than the iPad and less convenient than the iPhone!”

    Kim Bachrach
    Unemployed
  • “See, my natural instinct would have been to make it bigger and heavier, and maybe tack on a full-size keyboard.”

    Kurt Duncan
    Banquet Manager
  • “That’ll certainly make my regular iPad feel like a big grown boy.”

    Daniel Atmajian
    Burial Plot Salesman
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