Argentina Reclaiming Falklands

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Terrifying Uniformed Bachelorette Party Storms Local Bar

TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.

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Argentina Reclaiming Falklands

Argentina is reasserting its claim to the Falkland Islands from England. What do you think?
  • "I'd say settle it with a soccer match, but it would only result in more deaths."

    Xavier Jones
    Tapestry Weaver
  • "I agree. England has hoarded that vast supply of delicious penguin eggs for far too long."

    Taylor Williams
    Dairy Farmer
  • "Was this in Evita? Because if it wasn't covered in Evita, I probably don't know what it's about."

    Lois Fleisch
    Concession Stand Cashier
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