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Army Recruitment On Campus

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Entire Broncos Organization Announces Retirement After Super Bowl Win

‘There’s Nothing Better Than Going Out On Top,’ Says Every Denver Player, Coach, Executive, Trainer, Office Administrator, Janitor

SANTA CLARA, CA—Following the team’s 24-10 victory over the Carolina Panthers in Super Bowl 50, every single member of the Denver Broncos organization officially announced their retirement Sunday.

Family, Friends Concerned After Peyton Manning Wanders Away From Pocket

SANTA CLARA, CA—Admitting to being “worried sick” after realizing he had suddenly disappeared in the middle of a play, family and friends of Peyton Manning grew incredibly concerned Sunday after the veteran Denver Broncos quarterback wandered away from the pocket during the first quarter of Super Bowl 50, sources confirmed.
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Army Recruitment On Campus

The Supreme Court ruled that universities must allow military recruiters on campus if they are going to accept federal money. What do you think?
  • "So...exactly how much do you have to endow for permission to raise an army?"

    Sara Dunne
    Goldsmith
  • "I thought I was being recruited once at my frat, but it turns out that Party Patrol is not one of our nation’s armed forces."

    Drew Alexander
    Systems Analyst
  • "Finally, an actual career path for 17th-Century French Lit majors."

    Chase Foy
    Financial Manager

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