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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Asteroid Narrowly Misses Earth

A 150-foot asteroid known as 2012 DA14 will pass by Earth today, coming within 17,000 miles of hitting the planet—closer than many communications satellites—and narrowly avoiding an impact that would have destroyed a 750-square-mile area of the surface. What do you think?

  • “Jesus Christ! Do you think it saw us?”

    Howard Rosenstein Unemployed
  • “What a great name for an asteroid!”

    Richard Goddard Can Filler
  • “What, that’s it? We’re not even going to try to blow it up?”

    Winnie Chapman Denture Finisher
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