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Mom In Nightgown Mode

APPLETON, WI—Noting that the changeover occurred “right on schedule” after she had finished the dishes and watched TV for an hour or two, family sources confirmed Monday night that local mom Linda Rampling had officially transitioned into nightgown mode.

Car Rolls Up To Stoplight Blasting Google Maps Directions

HOUSTON—Attracting the attention of adjacent motorists and nearby pedestrians who turned their heads to see where the booming noise was coming from, a 2006 Ford Focus is said to have rolled up to a local stoplight Friday blaring Google Maps directions.

34-Year-Old Asks For Big Piece

MADISON, WI—Directing the server to the large square in the corner, local 34-year-old Matthew Hinke asked for a big piece of cake during a workplace birthday party, sources confirmed Tuesday.
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Atlantic City Mayor Resigns

After an absence of nearly two weeks in which his whereabouts were largely unknown, Robert W. Levy, mayor of Atlantic City, NJ, returned to office only to resign. What do you think?
  • "Well thank goodness he's gone. Erratic and suspicious behavior has no place in Atlantic City."

    Paulina Kntuson Systems Analyst
  • "I'm still having trouble getting past the first part. Why would anyone–anyone–disappear from Atlantic City for more than an hour?"

    Tim Lunt Graphic Designer
  • "He was a terrible mayor. He promised us constituents hairsprays and cheese fries! Where are my hairsprays and cheese fries?!"

    Tony Regina Hot Dog Vendor

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