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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.
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Avoiding The Anti-Christ

A pregnant woman in England is trying to get her hospital to induce labor so the baby will not be born on 6/6/06. What do you think?
  • "Why didn't this woman do the responsible thing and get an abortion?"

    Annette Rogers Venture Capitalist
  • "Yeah, like it's that easy to trick Satan."

    Dick Harris Systems Analyst
  • "I went through the same thing when I feared my baby would be born a Leo."

    Liam O'Donnell Ticket Taker
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