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Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

New EPA Chief Proposes 30% Cut In All Carbon-Based Organisms

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that the nation would meet the ambitious benchmarks by the end of Donald Trump’s presidential term, Scott Pruitt, the president-elect’s nominee for chief of the Environmental Protection Agency, said Thursday he would seek a 30 percent cut in all carbon-based organisms upon assuming office.
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Beloved's Controversial Award

Some members of America's literary community are up in arms, claiming Toni Morrison's Beloved was named the best American novel of the past 25 years out of political correctness. What do you think?
  • "Beloved?! Over that, uh... one classic book? And what about that other one? Past 25 years, you said?"

    Amie Mondale Crime-Scene Cleaner
  • "Blah, blah, blah. When do we vote for best kebabs?"

    Andrew Blevins Building Manager
  • "Beloved is just another example of angry minorities trying to do away with the canon by generating moving works of literary genius."

    Syd Green Tailor

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