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Berlin Wall Came Down 20 Years Ago

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Teacher Who Learns More From Her Students Than She Teaches Them Fired

Explaining that her statements indicated a failure to understand and implement the district’s goal of providing a comprehensive education to all children, Southwest High School officials reportedly fired ninth-grade history teacher Jennifer Steenman today after she was heard saying she learns more from her students than they do from her. Full article.

‘People Are Inherently Good,’ World Halfheartedly Mutters

NICE, FRANCE—Following yesterday’s terrorist attack in Nice, France that left over 80 people dead and scores more injured, sources reported that a dazed and utterly dejected global populace halfheartedly muttered the phrase “People are inherently good” to themselves Friday.

Louvre Curators Hurry To Display Ugly Van Gogh Donor Gave Them Before Surprise Visit

PARIS—After retrieving the eyesore from amid a clutter of unused display cases and movable stanchions in the back of the facility’s basement where it had been stowed ever since the museum received it, curators at the Louvre hurried to display an ugly Vincent van Gogh painting before the artwork’s donor made a surprise visit to the museum Friday.

ISIS Starting To Worry New Recruit Huge Psycho

RAQQA, SYRIA—Admitting that the recently arrived jihadist’s disturbing behavior was becoming a serious cause for concern, several ISIS members told reporters Friday they were starting to worry that new recruit Said Hassad was a huge psycho.

National Security Experts: ‘ISIS Are Fucking Assholes’

WASHINGTON—Updating the public about the deadly attacks carried out in Brussels yesterday by members of the Syria-based jihadist group, national security experts held a press conference in Washington this morning to notify Americans that ISIS are fucking assholes.
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Berlin Wall Came Down 20 Years Ago

On Nov 9, 1989, the East German government announced that it would allow free travel between East and West Germany, an act that eventually led to the reunification of Germany. What do you think?
  • "I recall it was really touching when the East German government bureaucrats were tearfully reunited with the West German government bureaucrats."

    Troy Hall Systems Analyst
  • "I can still remember exactly what I was doing when I heard the news. I was fiddling with my slap bracelet when the newscaster cut in to Designing Women, causing me to spill New Coke all over my Big Johnson shirt."

    Daphne Varenka Oak Tanner
  • "What a great 20 years. It'll almost be a shame when the wall goes back up tomorrow."

    Scott Lee Railroad Car Loader

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