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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Bill O'Reilly Sex Scandal

Last week, a Fox News Channel producer sued Bill O'Reilly for sexual harassment, alleging that the cable host pressured her into phone sex. What do you think?
  • "Someone's coming at Bill O'Reilly with lurid public accusations of a heinous personal nature? Wow. Sometimes life can be so... fair."

    Peggy Knight Art Teacher
  • "He wasn't sexually harassing her. He was just looking out for her, like he's doing for all of us, all the time."

    Jonathan Warren Announcer
  • "No wonder it costs $3.99 a minute to call in to 'The Factor.'"

    Shawn Jiminez Assessor
  • "Whether Andrea Mackris' claims are true or false, one thing is certain—that woman is never working for the vast right-wing conspiracy again."

    Curtis Fletcher Systems Analyst
  • "This is just another example of the liberal media's bias against self-destructive, narcissistic, screaming sexist assholes."

    Andy Vaughn Clerk
  • "Just once, I'd like to hear about a sex scandal with honest-to-God penetration."

    Cindy Beck Food Scientist
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