Bin Laden Called 'Virtually Impotent'

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Vol 43 Issue 37

Description Of Sexual Fantasy Changing With Girlfriend's Reaction

Local resident Ethan Kendler's description of his sexual fantasies to girlfriend Rebecca LaBatt veered awkwardly from the kinky to the banal Sunday, as a raunchy but emotionally honest expression of carnal desire degenerated into inoffensive, marginally erotic entreaties.
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Bin Laden Called 'Virtually Impotent'

President Bush's Homeland Security adviser Frances Townsend referred to the figurehead of Al-Qaeda as "virtually impotent." What do you think?
  • "Ouch. That's gotta hurt much more than actually being captured."

    Byron Rauch
    Launderer
  • "Not the worst thing in the world. She could have said he was afraid of commitment."

    Misty Weigl
    Videographer
  • "That's what she said! Oh wait, we're talking about the most dangerous terrorist in the history of the world."

    Chuck Beato
    Sidewalk Installer
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