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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:
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Boomers On Social Security

The first U.S. baby boomer, born one second after midnight on January 1, 1946, has applied for Social Security benefits. What do you think?
  • "Wait a second. Not only do I have to pay to keep them safe from terrorists, I have to pay so they can retire, too?"

    Randy Venable Stenograher
  • "Things may look bleak right now but with our next postwar bubble of vigorous economic growth, it should be 1946 all over again in no time."

    Mary Errett Clothing Salesperson
  • "Fuck it. If this Social Security ship is about to sink, I'm telling Amy I love her!"

    Colin Halverson Systems Analyst
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