adBlockCheck

Boxing's Black Eye

Top Headlines

Entertainment

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Boxing's Black Eye

A New York grand jury is investigating whether judges received illegal payments in connection with the controversial March 13 Evander Holyfield-Lennox Lewis title fight, which was ruled a draw despite the fact that Lewis seemed to have easily beaten Holyfield. What do you think about this latest boxing scandal?
  • "Can't two black men beat the holy hell out of each other in this country any more without some sort of controversy?"

    Christopher Wooten Bond Trader
  • "Thank heavens Muhammad Ali isn't lucid enough to comprehend this shameful episode."

    Amy Des Jardins Graduate Student
  • "I saw the fight, and the decision was a complete sham. It was clear that Willie Pep had knocked out Kid Bassey in the fifth. What? The fight wasn't on Classic Sports Network?"

    Roger Traub Systems Analyst
  • "With regard to boxing, I have only one question: Why'd you fuck Joey?"

    Rajesh Bhawnani Shipping Clerk
  • "It's the children I feel sorry for; the doe-eyed, apple-cheeked cherubs who look up to these sledge-fisted brutes."

    Frances Phelan Pastry Chef
  • "What? A boxing match may have been fixed? That's fascinating. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to go contemplate the fact that I'm basically alone in the universe."

    Larry Mees Plumber

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close