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Brand, Perry Marry

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Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
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Brand, Perry Marry

British comedian Russell Brand wed pop star Katy Perry in a ceremony in India on Saturday. What do you think?

  • "Aw. I love when people decide to get married in a place that holds no cultural or religious significance to them prior to the day of their wedding."

    Logan Hooper Joint Cutter
  • "This reminds me of when what's her name married what's his face. Unfortunately for them, I don't think it worked out."

    Chloe Savage Protective Officer
  • "Uh, I have nothing prepared. May your union be fruitful?"

    Elijah Andridge Multifold Operator

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