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Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

New EPA Chief Proposes 30% Cut In All Carbon-Based Organisms

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that the nation would meet the ambitious benchmarks by the end of Donald Trump’s presidential term, Scott Pruitt, the president-elect’s nominee for chief of the Environmental Protection Agency, said Thursday he would seek a 30 percent cut in all carbon-based organisms upon assuming office.
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Bronx Zoo Loses Peacock

Following a high-profile cobra escape earlier this year, the world-famous Bronx Zoo had a peacock go missing this week. What do you think?

  • "I just feel bad for all the dumb dicks that paid to see this peacock."

    Nina Mackintosh Systems Analyst
  • "Oh shit, how poisonous are those things?"

    Steven Leclercq Pattern Maker
  • "Sure, it's easy to get out, but the moment you want to get in to fuck a penguin, security is all over your ass."

    Lee Hudson Unemployed

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