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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Bush In Jordan

President Bush is winding down a diplomatic tour with a visit to Jordan to meet with King Abdullah II and Iraq Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki. What do you think?
  • "It makes sense to hold such a summit in Jordan. After all, the number of Bush effigies per capita are slightly lower there than the rest of the Middle East."

    Phil Watson Park Guide
  • "Hopefully, Bush has learned a great deal on this big, long travel trip. For example, he has probably learned where Jordan is. Or at least that Jordan is a country in the world."

    Vic West Building Superintendent
  • "Extravagant meals, five-star hotels, vibrant cultural entertainment—the president is finally getting an accurate picture of what's going on on the ground."

    Brianna McCoy Candy Maker
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