adBlockCheck

Recent News

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
End Of Section
  • More News

Bush To Veto Torture Ban?

The Senate recently approved a ban on torture with a 90-9 vote, but the White House is threatening to veto the bill. What do you think?
  • "I never know when the White House is kidding anymore."

    Anna Lyndon Chemical Engineer
  • "Unless these enemies of the United States are captured, made really angry and resentful through embarrassing torture, then released, we will never stop terrorism."

    Joseph Teague Adjustment Clerk
  • "Perhaps they could do what they always do and just torture people anyway, then let the pictures tell the success story."

    Ian Bricke Systems Analyst
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close