adBlockCheck

Recent News

Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.

Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.
End Of Section
  • More News

Bush To Veto Torture Ban?

The Senate recently approved a ban on torture with a 90-9 vote, but the White House is threatening to veto the bill. What do you think?
  • "I never know when the White House is kidding anymore."

    Anna Lyndon Chemical Engineer
  • "Unless these enemies of the United States are captured, made really angry and resentful through embarrassing torture, then released, we will never stop terrorism."

    Joseph Teague Adjustment Clerk
  • "Perhaps they could do what they always do and just torture people anyway, then let the pictures tell the success story."

    Ian Bricke Systems Analyst

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close