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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.
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California Doctors Endorse Marijuana Legalization

The California Medical Association reached an agreement this weekend calling for marijuana's legalization, which the group said would allow the drug to be prescribed with greater understanding. What do you think?

  • "Say no more. I'm going home right now to give my kids some marijuana."

    Emma Barstow Systems Analyst
  • "My doctor wrote me a recommendation for medical marijuana. Not because it treats my various ailments, though, but because he feels sorry for me. I've never been too sure how to take that."

    Will MacArthur Paste-Up Artist
  • "My father died of stomach cancer and he didn't need pot."

    Harvey Bashford Rotary Driller
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