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Mom In Nightgown Mode

APPLETON, WI—Noting that the changeover occurred “right on schedule” after she had finished the dishes and watched TV for an hour or two, family sources confirmed Monday night that local mom Linda Rampling had officially transitioned into nightgown mode.

Car Rolls Up To Stoplight Blasting Google Maps Directions

HOUSTON—Attracting the attention of adjacent motorists and nearby pedestrians who turned their heads to see where the booming noise was coming from, a 2006 Ford Focus is said to have rolled up to a local stoplight Friday blaring Google Maps directions.

34-Year-Old Asks For Big Piece

MADISON, WI—Directing the server to the large square in the corner, local 34-year-old Matthew Hinke asked for a big piece of cake during a workplace birthday party, sources confirmed Tuesday.
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California Restaurant Busted For Serving Whale

The head chef of a Santa Monica sushi restaurant was charged with serving the meat of the endangered sei whale. What do you think?
  • "I don't get it, what's wrong? Did it taste bad or something?"

    Dominic Haskins Internal Audit Manager
  • "Sure, that's exotic, but nothing satisfies me more than feasting on the ultimate prey: chicken."

    Lorrie Murphy Accounts Receivable
  • "Serving whale? That's disgusting. Oh, look! Lasagna in a can is on sale at Albertson’s!"

    Noel Ash Prep Cook

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