adBlockCheck

Recent News

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
End Of Section
  • More News

Caravan Traveling U.S. To Oppose Drug War

Protesting the tens of thousands of deaths in Mexico resulting from the U.S. drug war, a group calling itself the “Caravan for Peace with Justice and Dignity” began a 20-city U.S. tour yesterday that will culminate in one month in Washington, D.C. What do you think?

  • “I assume anyone traveling in a caravan is pretty pro-drugs.”

    Bill Muenker Systems Analyst
  • “But the war on drugs was the war whose inefficacy we were best at concealing!”

    Roddy Blancaflor Quilting Machine Operator
  • “Yeah, well, they better not get in the way of my Free Mumia Convoy.”

    Regina Wilhoit Poultry Veterinarian

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close