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Man Knows Exactly Which Asshole Got Him Sick

SARATOGA SPRINGS, NY—Immediately realizing the genesis of the fever and sore throat that left him feeling like shit, 30-year-old local man Edward Mosley told reporters Tuesday that he knows exactly which asshole got him sick.

How Gerrymandering Works

The Supreme Court is considering a case regarding the partisan gerrymandering of districts in Wisconsin, which could change the way maps are drawn across the country. Here is a step-by-step guide to how Gerrymandering works.
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Cause Of Male-Pattern Baldness Discovered

A study published in Science Translational Medicine found that an abundance of a protein called prostaglandin D2 was responsible for male-pattern baldness. What do you think?

  • "That's great! Now that we've found what causes it, we can replicate it anywhere."

    James Vargo Systems Analyst
  • "You see that balding piece of shit standing over there? That's my husband. Go make his day and tell him about this crap."

    Stella LeDuc Sandblaster
  • "I hope any treatments for the condition lie far in the future. All these legions of mental-patient-looking white guys with shaved heads have grown on me throughout the years."

    Chris Gaspar Kiln Burner

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