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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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CDC: Drug-Resistant Bacteria Pose ‘Nightmare’ Threat

The head of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention issued a dire warning about antibiotic-resistant bacteria known as CREs, which after first appearing in 1996 have now been found in 42 states and were detected in 4.6 percent of all U.S. hospitals in 2012. What do you think?

  • “What is it with the CDC? It’s like they’re all a bunch of germ freaks over there.”

    Annabel Boyle Dance Therapist
  • “I appreciate anything that first appeared in the 1990s and has managed to stay relevant.”

    Joe Foggin Ship Painter
  • “Oh, well. We all gotta go sometime, right?”

    Matthew Suwinska Fireworks Maker
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