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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
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Chemical-Biological Weapons

Popping up everywhere from Iraq to Nevada in recent months, chemical and biological weapons are regarded by many experts as the war instrument of the future. What do you think about the threat of these so-called "weapons of mass destruction"?
  • "There's been a lot of negative talk about biological weapons lately. But believe me, you haven't lived until your lymph nodes have swelled to the size of musk melons."

    Susan Uselmann Student
  • "I was exposed to anthrax once, and it wasn't that bad, except for the spewing jets of pus part."

    Kenneth Choudhury Architect
  • "Speaking of biological weapons, don't go into the men's room. I just dropped a big fucking bomb in there, man."

    Steve Jordan Teacher
  • "I understand that the hated Kaiser and his marauding Huns are in possession of deadly mustard gas."

    Jeanne Whalen Journalist
  • "The government has been been in possession of secret biological doomsday weapons for decades, but covered it up with a shadow conspiracy. Want to see some downloaded Gillian Anderson nudie pics?"

    Chad Wilson Systems Analyst
  • "Those soldiers in the Gulf War came into contact with some chemical that still gives them hallucinations and uncontrollable spasms. You wouldn't happen to know where I could get some of that stuff, do you?"

    Matt Morris Lawyer

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