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Childhood ADHD Linked To Obesity Later In Life

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360 Tour: Inside The RNC

The Onion invites you to explore our view from the floor of the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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Childhood ADHD Linked To Obesity Later In Life

A study found that 41 percent of males who were diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder in elementary school were classified as obese at age 41, compared to just 22 percent among those with no history of the condition. What do you think?

  • “I knew there had to be a drawback.”

    Ralph Metzman Benefits Clerk
  • “God damn it, why does everything have to make me fat?”

    Sue Lombard Slag Worker
  • “And then they’ll finally fit in.”

    Herb Johnson Slipcover Cutter

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