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Children’s Book Pulled For Flawed Depiction Of Slavery

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Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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Children’s Book Pulled For Flawed Depiction Of Slavery

Scholastic has pulled their title A Birthday Cake For George Washington, a picture book about Washington’s slaves proudly preparing for his birthday party, due to many parents’ complaints that it misinforms children by romanticizing the relationship house slaves historically had with their masters. What do you think?

  • “Well, most children’s literature requires a suspension of disbelief.”

    Retha Hopper Commercial Clairvoyant
  • “This is a huge disservice to kids who want to learn the history of George Washington’s birthday cake.”

    Gerald Funke Systems Analyst
  • “Looks like the value of my copy just skyrocketed.”

    Nic Anderton Bridge Suspender

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